By Sabastian Astley

Published: Thursday, 27 October 2022 at 12:00 am


5.0 out of 5 star rating

Just over 25 years ago, the Doctor Who 1996 TV movie debuted – from the minds of producer Philip Segal and writer Matthew Jacobs, it was a last-chance effort to save the show. Their ideas were ambitious, Paul McGann as the Eighth Doctor was an inspired choice, and in many ways, the creative risks taken paved the way for some of the Russell T Davies revival’s greatest moments – but it wasn’t enough.

Reception was mixed at best – many decried Jacobs for his treatment of the Doctor, not only revealing the Time Lord to be half-human but also introducing a spark of romance with Daphne Ashbrook’s companion, Grace Holloway. (Given everything that’s followed, it’s hard to imagine now just how much a simple kiss could rile up the fandom.)

Ever since, the Eighth Doctor and his associates were stuck in a state of limbo – at first, no one knew where the TV movie sat on the timeline or if it even had a place. What’s more, those involved were unsure as to whether the fanbase would be willing to embrace them.

Understanding the TV movie’s place in the fandom is Matthew Jacobs’s objective in Doctor Who Am I. Co-directed by Jacobs and longtime-friend Vanessa Yuille, it chronicles his first experiences with the convention circuit, spotlighting the dedication of Doctor Who fans and the unique community that has sprung up around the show – but the film also explores how, just like The Doctor himself, Jacobs goes through his own transformation.

What’s important to understand is that this is not a chronicle of the TV movie’s development – although a myriad of the original cast and crew appear, Jacobs and Yuille are instead seeking to explore the TV movie’s evolving legacy over the past two decades.

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Doctor Who Am I
Strike Media

Jacobs takes lengths to push the focus of the documentary off of him, and onto the remarkable fans they encounter – there’s a touching humility to how Jacobs carries himself throughout much of Doctor Who Am I, including politely sitting through a fan’s half-joking beratement of some of the TV movie’s finer details.

But try as he might, Jacobs’s story is too fascinating not to explore – just as we discover each fan’s personal connection to the show, so do we begin to understand the complex emotional entanglement Jacobs has.

His father, Anthony Jacobs, was an actor who appeared in First Doctor serial The Gunfighters, and Matthew’s recollection of his day on the set begins to reveal that he’s perhaps much closer to this fantastical franchise than he has initially let on.

Every time that he attempts to distinguish himself from the typical Whovian fan, a moment occurs, or a memory is shared that betrays that deception – what begins to reveal itself is that this journey into the convention circuit is more than just an exploration of the TV movie’s legacy, but in fact a document of Jacobs attempting to understand his own complicated relationship with the show.