“Look how far you’ve come.”

By Abby Robinson

Published: Thursday, 08 June 2023 at 12:00 am


**CONTAINS SPOILERS FROM ALL FOUR SEASONS OF NEVER HAVE I EVER.**

Devi has weathered her fair share of romantic turbulence across Never Have I Ever’s four-season run. She spent much of the Netflix comedy oscillating between Paxton and Ben, who were polar opposites in every sense – and offered her something the other couldn’t, hence her indecision.

There was also her relationship with Nirdesh in season 3, which broke down due to his overbearing mother, and in season 4 she was sucked into Ethan’s orbit after initially resisting him, which almost jeopardised her college prospects, and very nearly landed her a criminal record. 

But, as entertaining as all of that was, this series has never been about Devi’s boy troubles.

"Devi
Devi in Never Have I Ever.

After her father collapsed and died right in front of her eyes during an orchestra recital, her life changed forever. At first, the most overt symptom of Devi’s grief was the loss of her legs, which stopped working without warning or medical explanation.

But as we spent more time with her, the emotional impact of her trauma quickly became clear: Devi was brimming with white hot rage.

The injustice of her father’s premature passing bore down on her at all times, manifesting in a temper that was quick to take hold, with anyone or anything capable of sending Devi into a frenzy.

Whether at school or at home, confrontation was simply par for the course, as regular as taking a shower, with her mother, in particular, suffering the harshest blows.

“I wish you were the one that had died that night,” she said during one particularly brutal row, which not only left Nalini broken-hearted and lost for words, but also deepened Devi’s self-loathing and her belief that she would never be able to assume control of her own emotions, leaving her feeling isolated and at the mercy of her rage.

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But through her therapy sessions with Dr Ryan and the benefit of time, Devi came to learn that she was both far stronger than she had given herself credit for, and if she wanted to swim rather than sink she must confront her emotions rather than fight them.

“When I first met you, you were a closed-off, angry little thing,” said Dr Ryan. “You didn’t want to get in touch with your feelings, your pain, your trauma. All you wanted to do was break stuff. But look at you. Look how far you’ve come. You faced your trauma and came out the other side. You survived. You’re a survivor.”

The Paxton-Ben love triangle had taken centre stage for much of Never Have I Ever, but Devi’s growth, which led her to that moment of powerful self-reflection, was always the beating heart of this narrative.